I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. –Psalm 32:8 ESV
When God called me out of teaching, I resisted. For the entire school year.
I loved teaching. It was – and still is – my passion. And don’t I preach, “Follow your passion”? I’d say, “If I’m cut, I’d bleed ‘teacher’.”
Was God really telling me to give up my job teaching English, journalism, and Bible at the Christian high school? This was my dream job. I must be mistaken, I thought. It made no sense. Our youngest son was in college, and my income helped pay college loans and other expenses.
Yet the nagging sense of unrest and unease persisted. Health problems arose, but I pushed through them. Where would they get someone to replace me? Certified teachers without permanent positions made more money substituting in the public schools than what the private school could offer.
When the school year finally ended, I asked friends to join me in prayer. I had a decision to make. I wanted to be absolutely sure I wasn’t misinterpreting what I sensed God telling me to do.
By the middle of July I had my answer. When I turned in my resignation, a sense of peace filled me. The year-long internal wrestling match ceased. The tightness around my head, like a giant rubber band, released its grip.
It still made no sense, and I still didn’t understand why. But I’ve learned sometimes God tells you to do something that, in your human perspective, doesn’t make sense. And I’ve learned I do not have to understand to obey.
I still don’t know why God called me out of teaching all those years ago, but it doesn’t matter. I won’t even ask Him when I get to heaven.
Two thousand years ago a bridegroom was about to send his betrothed away and divorce her quietly. She’d told him she was pregnant – by the Holy Spirit. He knew the prophecies, but still . . .
Then one night he had a dream in which an angel of the Lord appeared to him.
“Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife,” the angel said, “for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.”
When Joseph awoke, he took a step of faith and “did what the angel of the Lord commanded him and took Mary home as his wife” (Matthew 1:24).
He didn’t ask why. He didn’t demand a detailed explanation. He simply obeyed.
Understanding is not a prerequisite for obedience. Or trust. Or faith. Actually, understanding can be detrimental for faith.
What is faith, after all, but “confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see”? (Hebrews 11:1) And “if we hope for something we already see, it’s not really hope. Who hopes for what can be seen?” (Romans 8:24)
Faith and hope are intertwined.
I took a step of faith when I resigned from my teaching position. DH and I took a step of faith when he retired. I’m facing a step of faith in the near future, trying to resist wanting to understand where God is leading me – and why He wants me to press on, forget what is behind, and reach for what’s ahead (Philippians 3:13–14).
What step of faith is God calling you to take? Will you take it?
Thank You, Lord, for those who pray with me as I contemplate and prepare myself for the step of faith You are calling me to take. Amen.
Read and meditate on Matthew 1:18–25
© 2018 Michele Huey. All rights reserved.